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Friday, January 13, 2017

Happy Birthday Mom!


I don't think I have ever written about my Mom before. But, it's her birthday. And, I chose this year not to mourn on her day. I am choosing to celebrate the legacy she left behind. I am choosing to do so in a BLOG because I want to recognize other women I feel exuded the same Grace, Strength, Resolve, and Business Sense like my Mom.

She left an indelible impression on so many including me. She was tough at school and at home. She gave 38 years of her life to educating young people. I feel there are plenty women carrying that same spirit of giving. This blog will spotlight those women on the 13th of each month. January 13th, 1927 was my Mom's birthday. We celebrate today with this look back on her life.

Born in Archer, Florida to Sherman & Theola Williams. She was the youngest child like me. Sanders Williams was the oldest. Then came Mary, Bernice, Eather, Otis, and my Mom. I think it's important to note I grew up around all of them. And, all of my Uncles and Aunts poured into me. Aunt Mary moved off to Daytona, Florida. Aunt Bernice moved off to Miami. Uncle Otis moved off to Jacksonville. Uncle Sanders, Uncle Eather, and Doris settled right there around my Grandmother on the land. But, that was when family, was family. And, we went to visit those that were not local. And, when the others came home it was like a holiday.

Mom went off to college to Bethune-Cookman College and often talked about her interaction with Mary Bethune-McCleod. The Founder of Bethune-Cookman. She always talked about Ms. McCleod staying on them to be graceful young ladies. So, I have always had a love for BCC.

Born on July 10, 1875, in Mayesville, South Carolina, Mary McLeod Bethune was a child of former slaves. She graduated from the Scotia Seminary for Girls in 1893. Believing that education provided the key to racial advancement, Bethune founded the Daytona Normal and Industrial Institute in 1904, which later became Bethune-Cookman College. She founded the National Council of Negro Women in 1935. Bethune died in 1955.
From Bethune, Mom landed a position at Archer Community Elementary. I grew up in the halls of that school. I lived there. I knew those halls and offices like the back of my hand. And, I ran around that school daily waiting on Mom to finished work. I was in everybody's classroom; in everyone's office; and in the Teachers Lounge, and the Cafeteria. That Archer Community School raised me. All of those teachers raised me. Ms. Lee and Ms. Roth early and then the pioneers.

I had pioneer teachers like Lizzie Robinson Jenkins, Hazel Taylor, and Eva Bradshaw. Let me stop and thank them all right now. I got to see their interaction with each other up close. That in itself was inspiring, funny, and educative. Lol!

I got to see their reaction to Segregation ending in our public schools-I was 7 at the time. And, I didn't know at that time there was a black school and a white school. But, for one year I was bus off to the white school. They called that desegregation. But, I got be the informant for my Mom and the other teachers. They would ask me every afternoon, "How was it? Are they nice? What did you learn today? What are the teachers like? What did they have for lunch"

Make no mistake about it....these teachers hung together and often talked about how to make their teaching better; how to make their school and community better; and how to impact us more. They knew and accepted their roles to make education for us better.

Looking back, I don't know why things changed in that one year but, I finished 3rd-6th grade at Archer Community. Ms. Oglesby, Ms. Bradshaw, Ms.Taylor, and then Mom in 6th grade. I still say that was the worst year of my education at that time that 6th grade. To have your Mom be your teacher and then to come home with her was no vacation. But, it probably made me a better student and prepared me for HS and College.

Mom was the Community's Teacher. Mr. Tallman and Ms. Courtney leaned on her and came and got her out of her class many times for troubled students or irate parents. Yep, I remember some situations. With parents, though, she was able to connect with them and calm them down like no one in the front office could. She identified with them no matter how upset they were. And, Rebecca Robinson was one them that frequent the front office. I find this important to mention because that is the Mother of Rev. John Robinson. And, if Mrs. Robinson was in the front office, it was about to be a situation. There was an intercom system and throughout the halls and classrooms, you would hear, "Ms. Jones, could you please come to the office immediately?" That meant trouble and we need you to talk this parent down most of the times.

My Mom was known for many things.....but here are the ones I remember. She was a very strong educator. You didn't have to call a School Resource Officer to her class. And, she never had to call for backup. SHE didn't play. It was nothing to hear her say, "Boy sit down in my classroom!" Lol!
Yep, she was like that home too.

I run into people today! Twelve years after her passing and losing her battle to cancer and I cannot go home to Archer, Florida or Gainesville, Florida and not hear someone say, "Your Mom use to beat my behind in school." Lol.

My Mother taught all of her children. Euclid Jr., Sherman, and me. I found out from Ms. Inez Courtney over the Summer before my 6th Grade year, my Mother specifically asked for me to be in her Homeroom. Unheard of but, Ms. Courtney allowed her to ruin my 6th Grade year.

I remember her always staying on Mike Nattiel, Glen Cox, Richard Strange, Aaron Miles, Marvin Boykin, and so many more. I later realized she loved them so much. She wanted to see them make it. She wanted to see them flourished. The same thing with the girls. She stayed on us all. And, if there was something she thought was serious enough, she kept the student after class. I would say, "oh no, we are doing a home visit." She would call the parent and say, "____ won't be on the bus. I will be bringing them home so I can talk to you." That parent would be so humble and say, "Okay." That's because my Mom had taught them too.

I didn't realize Mom was blazing a trail. I didn't know she was leaving a legacy even then. But, if you were a student trying to do the right thing or a student that disrupted the class.....you later realized she was there to help and to give you a foundation of principles to live by.

Mom had some favorites. I think the first favorite I remember her having was my first cousin. She absolutely loved Sharon Williams. She bragged about her often. She loved her afro. (Yes she did! She thought Sharon had beautiful hair) She always said, "there is no one in our family that loves the camera and camera loves them back more than Sharon). I must say that is true today.

Around the halls of Archer Community, Mom truly respected Rayfield McGhee, Katie Mae Nattiel, Oscar Harris, Mr. Durant, Ms. Hines and Ms. Blitch. In fact, those people had just as much authority to reprimand us as the principal Mr. McGhee. Mother loved Margaret Brown, Annie Pearl, Jewel Miles, Dorinda Nobles, Antoinette Williams, Tammy Trainham, and her brother Bobby.  She loved Danny Blitch and Louise Blitch. She had an admirable relationship with Inez Courtney. And, I know there were so many more. My apologies for leaving some off.

Mother love to cook. And, she didn't do a lot of recipes. She cooked from the heart. And, she cooked plenty no matter what day of the week it was. You ate at my house. And, nothing was frozen or canned. You got a full course meal in my house. She was known for her Chicken & Rice, Fried Chicken, Sweet Potato Pie, Custard Pie, Cheesecake, Cream Corn, and her sweet tea.

She loved clean. And, she would say, "You don't have to be rich to be clean and organized."
She loved to dress. And, had a hat for every outfit. She loved the Spiegel Catalog. And, then she loved the QVC Channel.

Mom is gone now. Lost her battle to cancer, November 2004. In her last few months we made Blackberry Doobie, (Southern name for Blackberry Cobler), Barbequed Goat, Cracklin Cornbread in a skillet, Egg Custard Pies, and talked about everything under the sun. She eventually told me she was tired. And, she needed to make sure her only girl was okay. I told her it was okay.

Lots of people called. Uncle Eather came twice to see her in Jacksonville. Aunt Clyde checked on her often. Aunt Bernice never came up. I assume she didn't want to see her sister like that.
In the middle of her sickness, she lost her brother Uncle Otis. She planned that funeral in October. (A show of her true strength). And, then went on to be with him in November. She and Uncle Otis were close. I am sure they still are.

My hero during that time was Lizzie Robinson-Jenkins. She walked me through it all. She took so much pressure off. So did Amos Penny, Henry Penny, Clarence Robinson and the entire Cooking Club that showed up at our home on the day of the funeral at 6AM. Thank you to Oretta Duncan at that time and how she handle the entire family. Thank you to my family Duncan Bros.

My Mother left beautiful women behind. Her Granddaughters, Shannel, Lauren, Kristen, Solange, and Chantel. Her grandsons, Desmond, Devin, and Sherman Jr. are not so bad either. They have turned out to be wonderful Men in my eyes.

I could not do this without mentioning her nieces and nephews. Shay, Eathan, Anne, Jeffrey, Gloria, and, Nathaniel.

And, if you really want to see where this legacy comes from look no further than Aunt Nita, Aunt Sissy, and Aunt Pauline. I wish I knew what I know now. I would have interviewed them daily. They wore confidence like silk. They were all great cooks and all made you sit to their table when you came over.

I am reflecting on the powerful legacy because it is time. No more sadness. I realize at this point that is not what she would want. She would want me to do something to make a difference. This is the start. The Breast Cancer Awareness was a start. The Doris Williams Cooper Learning Center is next.

I am that legacy. The woman that birth me exuded Grace and Strength. And, truly Grace Wins!


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